• Episode Followup: Steven's Dream / Adventures in Light Distortion

    Another year, another Steven Bomb! Last year, Garnet woke Steven up to tell him about The Answer, but this year she let him sleep so he could dream. And what an episode he dreamed up, let me tell ya! Let's check this thing out after the break.

    And we start the episode off with crying. Just straight out of the gate. That's how you know it's quality Steven Universe. I get you, Rebecca Sugar! I know what you're about!


    "Oh, gee! Look at the time! And my classy new watch!"
    Flaunting your wealth, Greg? I hope you're saving most of it!

    Just in case you forgot, the show makes sure to remind you how beautiful a setting they can create. The Crewniverse includes some hella talented artists!

    Pictured: Connie's flair for the dramatic and Steven's enjoyment of the fireworks. I mean heck, she got some of the paper to do a loop over their heads. Impressive!

    Ooooooh yes! The new location from Buddy's Book! Are we gonna go there today? 

    C'mon Steven, seeing Garnet this distressed should give you a pretty good reason not to go...

    Connie and Amethyst are the smart ones here. If it's not your fight, staaaay out of it!

    Ooh, and bring popcorn! You two have the right attitude!

    "Ahh shoot, now I've made it more interesting!"
    Yes you have! He's gonna go no matter what you say, Garnet, at least tell him why he shouldn't go!

    Well, she didn't, so it's off to The Palanquin then! Where in the wide wide world could that be?

    Korea? That wasn't an option! Pearl didn't mark The Palanquin? Then how the heck did Buddy find it? 

    Uncle Andy's back! I was a bit worried that we'd never see him again after Gem Harvest.

    "It's going to be very serious work! No time for fun at all." "Well, isn't there time for a little fun?" "Hmmm..."
    *Aggressively Struggles Internally*

    Turns out there was time for all the fun! It's good to see Greg and Steven spending some quality time together.

    ...Including a visit to either SMIP or Rough Draft, the Korean animation studios that animated the very sequence we're watching right now! Fourth wall broken. Immersion ruined. Disbelief suspended. Moving on!

    "This feels familiar."
    You're tellin' me? The handwriting is identical! I guess the Gems' M.O. is to persuade the local authorities to put the fence up, then add their own flair?

    *Gasp* It's Emperor Palpatine Blue Diamond! Steven, this is what Garnet was trying to warn you about! Now we're all doomed! But hey, Steven seems to have some weird empathy powers, so at least we learned that about him before his horrible and inevitable demise.

    "I think we're not alone..." "Heeey! Um... nice day out, huh? I - I didn't see you there, what's uh... what's... up? "
    Real smooth, Greg. Best first contact ever. Oh hey, I guess this means Blue Pearl isn't mute!

    "I'm surprised that a human being is capable of understanding how I feel..."
    That's our Greg! He may be awkward, but when you fall in the deep stuff, he's been there and he knows the way out!

    "It's a shame... there's a geo-weapon incubating inside your planet that will destroy everything shortly. But you don't deserve that, do you?"
    Aww, look! Blue Diamond's not evil! She's sad, and she's kind! Sure, she was all "You'll be broken for this!" 5000 years ago, but people change! The death of a loved one is sure to change you.

    No no no, wait! Stop! The Cluster's been dealt with; the geo-weapon is stopped! Don't steal our Greg!

    Looks like Steven's mastered his floating powers so he can use them even when he's upset! Sadly, it was too little, too late.

    "I saw you come here! I saw Blue Diamond on Earth! I saw her see me and find all of us! I couldn't be here with you!"
    Bu-u-ut you could've told Steven Blue Diamond was there and that it was too dangerous to go right now! You could've told him and prevented this whole thing, Garnet! But that's in the past. What are we going to do now?

    "We're going to space. We're going to get him back."
    Chills. Estelle isn't your traditional voice actress, but dang does she deliver!

    And we swap out the writing team for Part 2! Hilary Florido and Lauren Zuke. Incoming Peridot and hilarity!

    "Blue Diamond!? O-o-on Earth?" "Holy smokes! They're all coming out of the woodwork!" "Amethyst, turn into a chair, I-I need to sit down..."
    Wow, mention any of the Diamonds around Pearl and she loses her cool, big time. Also there's a couch like 10 feet behind you, Pearl. 

    "That's right. We're going into space, and we're not coming back without Greg."
    That's not Future Vision talking, either. That's just Garnet's pure force of will.

    "Sorry, Connie, but we just can't wait. Dad's in trouble and we need to go into space to get him back! There's no time! We're going right now. Just... protect Beach City for me while we're gone."
    No! You can't write Connie out like this! You have a space ship! You can fly to her house and pick her up in like no time at all! Steven, don't do this to me her!

    "Lapis, Peridot, stay here. You'll have to protect Beach City if something happens while we're gone."
    Pictured: The face of "I totally intend to do that thing you just said."

    Pearl, careful, you've flown straight into an asteroid field!

    Aww, yiss! The Rubies are back! Well, Doc at least. 

    "Sorry, Rubies." "We should really do something about them." "We can pick 'em up on the way back. Dad comes first."
    And Army and Navy! And as soon as they arrived, they're gone again. Ah well, at least Leggy didn't get rammed by the ship. She doesn't deserve that. I'm holding you to your promise, Steven!

    "Well, at our current speed, we should be reaching the human zoo in... approximately 70 human years! Just in time for Greg's 110th anniversary of being alive."
    Lordy lordy, Greg is 40! And Steven is just about 15, by now, right? He turned 14 a year ago... So Steven was born when Greg was around 25! Just in case you were wondering. Also, nice expressions, you two!

    "If being a pancake means saving my dad, then bring on the syrup!"
    I love this episode.

    Pictured: the face of instant regret.

    Munchkin Gems! This episode just keeps getting better.

    Pearl is even pointier at this size, somehow.

    "Hmm, check it out! Puma Cub!"
    Aww! I need fanart of this! More fanart!

    Our Ruby for scale. Even at this size, Garnet's still the tallest.

    "Ugh, why doesn't she ever tell us anything? This is why we don't listen to her!"
    I really love this episode.

    And now we get to the distortion.


    I wonder what gem this is!

    Diamond! They'd ride in a ship like this? I guess it's better than walking...

    So far, Manual Mode isn't working out. Is this what physicists mean by "spaghettification"?

    Perfect! Nailed it!

    Nope, never mind.

    Yes Steven that definitely looks like a button you want to press.

    Well now you've gone and done it! The Gems are poofed and so are your hopes of reaching the Zoo intact, buddy!

    Hey, I thought this was Cartoon Network, not Boomerang! Ha ha, am I right? I'll be here all week, folks!

    Something about this sequence seems familiar...

    "It doesn't seem like it right now, but later, we're gonna laugh... if I can just stop the ship!"
    Good attitude! Steven always manages to keep his spirits up under pressure.

    Um, hey Diamond Authority? I'd like to report a significant design flaw in your Roaming Eye spacecraft. Yes, I understand the safety systems were turned off. But I mean come on, what if there wasn't a half-human onboard to get them out of this mess?

    "It isn't going to stop. There's no fixing this. It's all my fault! I rushed us. I pushed us into making stupid mistakes! ... I wasn't trying to be selfish. I just wanted to know what was going on for myself, for once! But now, I lost everyone."
    Yikes, this episode got real in a hurry. Poor Steven. Being trapped all alone on a crashing space ship that you can't stop sounds despair-inducing no matter who you are. You should've brought Connie, Steven! Then you wouldn't be alone! She'd probably be stuck against the back wall of the ship, unable to help, and in just as much mortal danger as you! Oh, uh... ok, maybe not bringing Connie was for the best...

    Ouch! This is why we wear seat belts!

    Steven Universe, animated by Bethesda.

    Everything's ok now, the Gems are back from their trip to Didney Worl!

    "So you were just lagging behind the ship this whole time."
    I love this image. Can't you just imagine the Roaming Eye zooming past, with Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl fluttering along behind it like streamers on a kite? I'm gonna need some fanart!

    "I-I was pushing so hard. I... I just wanted to get Dad back so much! I-I almost wrecked the mission! This whole thing is my fault."
    Poor kiddo. He's just been through one heck of a trip. Someone comfort him!

    "Steven, you didn't kidnap Greg; Blue Diamond did. ... What you did got us to the Zoo."
    Bam. 16 words to make it all alright again. The power of Garnet.

    Ooh, wow, the Zoo! What a cool design! I wonder if all gem space stations look like that. And it's in orbit around... Saturn. C'mon Pearl, Saturn isn't 70 years away from Earth even at human spacecraft speeds. Unless... did Pink Diamond steal Saturn? Here's hoping we find out on the next episode of Steven Universe, conveniently airing later today!