• Episode Followup: The New Crystal Gems

    Aww yes, we got a mom-swap and a Connie swap episode all rolled into one! It's good to have a Crewniverse that anticipates and fulfills our wants and needs. And all you folks wanting more of Happy Lappy, we got that too! Let's dive in.


    Ahh, back on solid ground! You brought the Rubies, right? Y-you promised! ... Steven? Steven, where are the Rubies?

    CONNIE 👏 EPISODE 👏

    "I restocked all the cereal and washed all the towels."
    That proud nod. I think Connie just earned a Pearl Point! 

    "There's no time! We're going right now. Just... protect Beach City for me while we're gone." "You can count on me!"
    See this is why Connie is so great. She knows Steven is in a hurry so she doesn't take it personally. She just accepts the new mission with all the enthusiasm she can muster!

    Burglars hate her! One weird trick this Beach City teenager discovered to combat home invaders!

    "Uh, don't you knock?" "Weirdo."
    LAPIS 👏 AND 👏 PERIDOT 👏 EPISODE 👏

    "You almost drowned me when you tried to steal the world's water?" "I almost drowned a lot of people."
    Wow, not even an apology. Dang Lapis, you're lucky the humans on your Earth are much more easy-going than the ones on our Earth.

    "I call Garnet!"
    Well, you already have a visor and a thing in the middle of your forehead, so you're 70% of the way there.

    "New Crystal Gems, congregate!"
    And pose! In order of "in-to-it" from least to most: Lapis, Connie, Pumpkin, Peridot, Rose's Sword.

    Stop everything. They're holding hands! ... I think! Either way it's cute!

    Also they're not even dating yet and Connie's already wearing his shirts. The girl moves fast!

    Nailed it! Also, sunglasses over visor? I know the feeling. Must be a prescription visor.

    *Giggle snort*
    Oh wow she's even doing the voice. I want to frame this moment and keep it forever. Happy Lappy! It's a tough call, but I think this might be best face of the episode.

    "Heeeeeelp!""Go! New Crystal Gems!"
    The rare instance of Buck Dewey raising his voice. He still manages to sound chill.

    Omigosh, are they doing the thing?

    YES THEY ARE DOING THE THING! I knew they'd always find a way!

    "Water we waiting for?" "Ha ha, good one, Steven!" "Whatever you say, dudes. BURRRRP!"
    You see what I meant when I said it was hard to pick a best face?

    And then there's this face which is... uh oh. This is the face of something bad about to happen.

    Uh... oh! That turned out much better than expected!

    "After such a rocky start, it finally seemed like the New Crystal Gems were coming together!"
     Aww yeah! Can we have next Steven Bomb devoted to the New Crystal Gems? They're great!

    Wow, quite a line-up! The Cool Kids, Yellowtail, Ronaldo wanting to wash his... scooter?...  and uh... oh...

    Are you ok, Jenny and Sour Cream?

    Ok yeah see this is a bit closer to what I expected last time. Lapis, keep a leash on it!

    "That's right, Pearl does like soap!"
     This might be the most adorable pumpkin in cartoon history. 

    "I agree. Maybe you should let someone else play The Garnet."
    And here's where this already amazing episode goes into overdrive. Seriously, was Jennifer Paz doing an Estelle impression the inspiration for this whole episode? Because it's excellent.

    Ok this is pretty much exactly what I expected the first time. Lapis, stop! People are fragile!

    "Amethyst, I have the glasses!" "There is no Amethyst! Only Garnet!"
    Peridot calling Lapis "Amethyst." Now Lapidot and Amedot shippers can be happy!

    The Cool Kids are great role models for this show's target audience, by the way. They're implicitly cool, but they're always there to help out. They'll save your dad!

    Take one last look... 

    RIP Cute Elephant Car Wash Sign, 19XX-2017 😢

    "Look at us, we're all fighting with each other! But we all love each other. And you all love me. So we all have to do this together! For love!"
    That is pretty much what Steven would say. It's like Connie watches the show!
      
     "Steven would've had a better speech." "I know, she didn't even cry!"
    Be careful what you wish for, Peridot. When Connie cries, someone dies. Probably. Remember what she's capable of.

    "So I'm not Steven. Maybe he's really great at helping people work out these arguments. Maybe he's really patient and caring, even though it must be hard for him having to be the adult for a bunch of super-powered children!"
    Ouch! It had to be said though, it really did. And the fact that Connie was the one to finally say it makes it even better.

    Well hey, that's... actually really cool! And it personalizes the place to Greg! Guess all that time spent making meep-morps has paid off! 

    Yes! The Crystal Temps! Encore! We definitely need more episodes with these four in the future. ROLL THE THEME SONG!